The Delicate Art of Discipline, and Baby's First Sentence

There comes a time in every girl's life, when she needs to be popped in the mouth.  My daughter is only two, but her time has come.  Does this make her some kind of prodigy?

"This works as a tiara, right?

Princess Defiant has taken to making "raspberry" sounds at me when she does not like what I have to say.  She presses her two little lips together and, well, spits at me basically.  Queen Who-shall-not-be-defied (that would be me) can not tolerate this.  Obviously.

Immediate action was required.

She spit at me.  I got in her face down at her level and told her, calmly, but emphatically, "No!"

She did it again.  Harder.  I took too fingers, and swatted her lips.  Still calm.  "No!"

She did it again.  Not as hard.  I swatted her lips.  "No!"

She did it again.  But, not really.  Only about half way.  Barely a sputter really.  Mostly just a gesture to show me she was not going to obey.  But she was fading.  I swatted her lips.  "No!"

Then she slapped at me and sort of grunted.  I slapped her hand and said, "No!"

She did it again.  I slapped her hand.  "No!"

She did it again.  Barely a twitch of the hand this time.  But defiance, nonetheless.  I slapped her hand.  "No!"

Then she stuck her tongue out.  Oh.  Okay.  So she wants to be popped in the mouth some more.  I swatted her tongue.  Still very calm.  "No!"

She did that three times too, losing steam each time.

Then she said it.  Her first sentence.  In defeat, arms submissively at her side, she said, as politely as one could, "Go away, Mommy."

Fair enough.  She used her words instead of spitting, hitting, or sticking her tongue out.  And, I had been in her face quite a while.  So, I kissed her on the head, and went away.

Yes, my two year old daughter told me to go away and I went.  But, I won this one, and she and I both know it.